Summer Lovin’

It’s summer, baby! The time for fun in the sun, sand, and sea. Time for adventure, vacations and exploration. Hot days in the sun with fresh food and cool drinks. If none of this resonates with you, it’s possible you don’t like summer. As an American who grew up in the Midwest, summer for me meant gardening, the county fair, time at the lake or river, sleep overs, and ice cream. My family loved summer in a simple way that makes me smile wistfully.

Having a summer birthday, I think of my birthday parties, which were nothing fancy, but special nonetheless. Growing up a Girl Scout and active in 4-H, I also consumed a great deal of time volunteering, crafting, hanging with farm animals, and quality time at the county fair.

We frequently had a garden, and to this day, the smell of a tomato plant takes me back to the cherry tomatoes in my mom’s small garden. She made a planter out of an old tractor tire (they’re quite large, if you’re unfamiliar), and alternated between strawberries and tomatoes.

The fields surrounding my childhood home bore corn some years, and soybeans other years. Being from an area of Ohio that claims to be the “largest Amish community area in the world”, farm-fresh stands complete with vegetables, fruits and baked goods speckled the sides of the roads.

Food and meals in the summer seemed more spectacular to me as a kid. Any trip to the pool wasn’t complete without watermelon, and we got treated frequently to ice cream from the local drive-in. It was only open from Memorial Day to Labor Day, so I definitely had my fair share of soft-serve ice cream cones in that three month stretch.

Later on, I worked at that same drive-in for a couple years throughout junior high. Although it wasn’t very healthy or fresh, I loved being in the food scene and helping people get their lunch. If I’ve learned anything about myself over the years, it’s that I am true to my roots and authentic self in wanting to help people. Seeing lightning bugs (or fireflies, depending on where you’re from) still makes me want to run outside and catch one. Especially in summer, I’d prefer a lazy, lakeside picnic to a fancy dinner any day.

In essence, the summers I spent as a child embody the very idea of childhood in itself. Those memories are not ones I would be quick to part with.

Adulting and Summers

To be honest, I don’t enjoy summer now as I did in my childhood. Of course I adore and even covet summer with my children, creating magical memories around our days at home. Our yearly trip to the beach is special, sweet, and simple. I consider myself blessed to be able to work from home and spend quality time with my loved ones, while being able to travel to Ohio for family. But if I’m being real, there are reasons it’s not so fun too.

For starters, it’s too hot for me. Living in the the south with the humidity and heat is something I will never get used to. Being a person who typically thrives in unstructured environments struggles in the summer because everyone is at home, and not everyone enjoys the structure-free days.

Among my not-so-summer-favorites list? Meals! Yes, me. The person whose passion and energy come from creating meals. Even people like me become exhausted with feeding the family during various seasons of life. I think every mom of my generation despises the constant snack eating our children display. Like, how in the world do they go from eating one snack and one lunch during their school day to eating virtually on the hour every hour? It’s a mystery. It’s also infuriating.

In my mind, I know they don’t NEED that much food, but one can only stand so firm against the frequent snack nagging. I can only imagine when my children who are nine, seven, and almost five are all five years older. We’ll be eaten out of house! Thankfully, we’re teaching our kids how to tend and take care of a garden. Perhaps they can grow their own food at that point…

Aside from children morphing into bottomless pit eaters, I also struggle with balance. A balance between a laid-back summer with days that creep by, and kids who stay in their pajamas until heading to the creek. Another being the balance of once-in-a-lifetime experiences. Those experiences that can only be done in summer, like camping trips, traveling for multiple days, sightseeing and lingering at favorite restaurants.

Here’s the deal: at the end of the day, we only get one life. No do-overs or retakes. I am a firm believer in seizing the day with gumption, yet slowing down enough to create beautiful moments from the ordinary and seemingly mundane moments of life. So creating a balance where these worlds not only collide but coexist well, is somewhat trying. I am certain you understand.

Childhood

If you can’t tell from my reminiscing above, one of the things I am passionate about is enjoying childhood. All children should have the opportunity to truly embrace childhood. This passion is not about going above and beyond to force a daily magical experience. There are many moms I personally know who are totally guilt ridden if their child doesn’t have the birthday party of their dreams, or a one-of-a-kind memorable day on a frequent basis. My passion does not lie there.

I do not buy into the mindset that children should have a pain-free, perfect childhood receiving everything their hearts’ desire. From my experience as a teacher, I learned that almost every child, no matter the background or where they were from, desired the freedom to simply be a kid. To be silly, to laugh, to explore. To have days with no expectations, and play make-believe and create.

Of course there are children and families who aren’t as privy to certain behaviors, advantages or ideals. I understand everyone has different goals, lifestyles, and abilities. Knowing this, I still cling to the idea that childhood can contain all of the beauty, thrill, and trial life offers.

To get to the point, I am on a mission to make our summer a lovely blend of my childhood and their current reality. This takes effort, planning, and thoughtfulness. It’s not easy to endure the chaos that sometimes consumes the days with children at home. It’s equally challenging to find activities to suit everyone, all while keeping the troops properly fed. Are you raising your hand in agreement yet?!

My goal in writing this blog post is to leave you with practical thoughts and tips on how to have a wonderful (not perfect) summer. A wonderful summer no matter the length or where you live. I obviously do not have all the answers, and there will be something I write here that doesn’t work or fit for you life. It’s all okay.

If there’s at least one thing you take away, implement or love from this post, I am honored. I am doing my job of writing and providing. So below, you will find topics broken into three categories with ideas in each. You may work full-time out of the house, or travel for work, so these ideas may need to be tweaked or tried on the weekends. I’m calling them, “Ways to Love Summer”, as we should all do, despite the challenges!

Ways to Love Summer

Keep it Simple

It doesn’t have to be fancy, expensive, or popular. If you or your family enjoys it, do it! Even if there’s some whining or complaining from the kids, do it anyway. If you have your family’s best interests and needs in mind, you will most likely not go wrong.

There will provably be a small disaster or two, and a kid may claim to hate it, but at the end of the day, you made a memory. You have an experience that can’t be taken away, and I’ll bet you learned something from it. Down the road, you’ll most likely laugh about the leaky tent, wacky person you met, crazy weather, or horrid food experience.

• Camping: even if it’s not your “thing” get out of your comfort zone, if you’re physically and health-wise able. Nowadays there are “glamping” places: glamorous camping. Look some up and give them a try! Camping is inexpensive, a way to experience nature, and a way to bond.
• Themed Days: this is a great one for days spent at home. Gather the family and have everyone make a list of “themes” to incorporate, such as board game day, movie day, dress-up day, art day, exploration day. As a family, you can brainstorm ways to get creative with the themes and even offer prizes. Who wouldn’t want ice cream for breakfast as a prize for best dressed on dress up day?
• Make a “summer bucket list”: browse the web and find local attractions from you city or area. Have each family member come up with three ideas to add to the list. Ideas could include restaurants, festivals, local tourist attractions, hiking or biking trails, tours, nature preserves, parks, etc. Many local and national parks offer free activities that are family friendly. If you look for things to do outside of your typical, you’ll find them.
• Old-fashioned play dates: set up play dates where your kids can simply play with other kids. Do a “kid swap” day, where you send your kids to a trusted friend who also has kids; you take their kids in return on another day. Even if it’s only for an hour, it can be enough. If you have family near, allow for it to be family/cousin/aunt time.

Be Prepared

If you’ve read any of my other blog posts, you know I don’t pride myself on being the most prepared person in the room. It’s never come naturally to me, yet I have improved and developed a few good methods over the years.

This section is mostly for how to be prepared with food. Since I went on a tangent above regarding my kids’ insane summer eating habits, I thought it best to show what’s been working for us so far this summer. Like I stated above, some of these ideas may not work for you, so take these with an open mind and lose hold.

• Get your pantry and refrigerator stocked and organized! Enlist someone to help if organizing isn’t your strength. Load up on healthy snacks and simple things for kids to make on their own. Keep the food items you most want your children to eat visible so when they verbalize their hunger, they can hopefully choose well. We keep a ton of fresh fruit around. This helps them make better choices in what they want, plus is also typically easy to eat and serve.
• Keep lunches simple. No one needs to have gourmet lunch. As I have shared before, if they’re fed, you’re winning. If your child is attending a camp, daycare, play date, etc. have them either pack their own or help them pack their lunch ahead of time. Often, we do “snacky” lunches. I lay out several snack items, like crackers, cheese, fruit, nuts, cut veggies, dips, granola bars/bites/balls, etc. and allow them to make their own plate. I usually have some parameters, like they must choose one vegetable, one fruit, one protein, one sweet, etc.
• Make a “schedule” or loose routine for eating times. If you’re like me, you probably had some sort of feeding schedule with your newborn. It was semi-set and expected, but ebbed and flowed with the baby’s phases. Think of meals during the summer in this light. Some days you may eat lunch at 10:30 am, and other days at 2 pm. When I do a routine for my kids, I put 2-3 hours between meals by letting the kids know the time of the next snack or meal. Then I set the oven timer to keep me accountable. Are they complaining about hunger? Up the food on the next meal, or have them drink more to stay hydrated. This may take some time getting used to, but I promise if you hold your ground, they’ll fall in line. There may be a day where it all falls apart and you hand them a snack after 30 minutes because you’re about to lose it. I get it, and I’ve been there. Just try again later or the next day.
• Drink you meals! Try doing a smoothie, healthy milkshake, or popsicles. There are hundreds of recipes out there for all of these. Take 10 minutes or so to make a list, screenshot, or download some fantastic recipes. Allow your children to help as well so they’ll be excited and willing. In terms of drinks, find healthier ways to keep them hydrated. Try drinks like the Body Armor brand (think a healthier, cleaner version of Gatorade), Honest Juice, or Hint Juice. We are huge fans of all three of these, as the kids love them, and I’m not worried about the sugar content.

Enjoy

Seriously. This one should be the easiest, but I know it is possibly the biggest challenge. Majority of us can end up frazzled, exhausted, and counting down the exact minutes until the kids head back to school. I believe we’re naturally inclined to wish time away when things may be out of our control, or just plain hard.

My biggest takeaway in my current season of life is to simply let go of my expectations in order to truly relish the moment. The saying, “the days are long but the years are short” feels painfully true, and I am all too aware of how numbered my days are with my children. It takes a conscious effort to remind myself that the goofy phases, weird obsessions, and sometimes poor choices will soon morph into other things with the next age or phase.

I don’t say these things to pardon unacceptable behavior, or let things that should be confronted off the hook. See it as a gentle reminder that our children, our most precious loved ones, are only little once. We get 18 summers, as they say. I want to make memories, listen to my children tell ridiculous stories, and watch as they try something new.

It’s far too easy to allow the complexity and pressures of life to distract us from what’s really important: people. love. purpose. making an impact. starting or continuing a legacy. God’s calling for our lives. Whichever of those proverbially called out to you, impress it upon yourself. I probably do not need to remind you that life is precious, fragile, and fleeting. I hope the ideas below ignite something within you that serves your summer so well, it sticks for future summers and possibly even runs over into your day to day going forward.

• Create a summer quote, saying or phrase. As a family, come up with something positive that reminds you of the special time together. It can be made up or found in a book or online. Write it on post-its, print it off, use a white board marker on mirrors, etc. to display it in several areas around the house.
• Allot time to simply be. Whether you work from home as a wife and mom, work from home with a typical job, or go to work, you can find and create time in your schedule. In our house, we call it quiet time. It’s usually 30 minutes to an hour of alone time in our rooms doing whatever we want. This may not be possible with the ages of your children, but I highly encourage you to make something along these lines happen. We have been created to nap, think, ponder, read, and create. This time can be for these much-needed outlets, plus also allow an opportunity to decompress.

• Be okay with being bored. Being bored has certainly gained a bad reputation. If I had to guess, when your children admit those dreaded words, it conjures way more guilt for you than you want to admit. I am not offended by those words. I may help my kids come up with a few ideas of things to do, but mainly, it’s up to them to solve the “bored problem”. Our children need to be problem solvers and use their critical thinking skills, so why not let them? If they cannot learn to be bored, entertain themselves, and think independently at a young age, when will they learn? They should not be distracted and entertained 24 hours a day. It’s not our job to entertain and craft every second of our children’s day. It is, however, our job to raise them to be functioning, independent adults who have a capacity to thrive. Not giving them to chance to figure out boredom robs them of a growth opportunity. I do not mean for you to ignore your children or not have boundaries in what their day looks like. My main point is to essentially free you from being their constant entertainment, and give you permission to allow them to grow in this area.
• Stop comparing. I personally know it’s enticingly easy to see a friend’s beautiful photo of their toes in the sand and feel like our summer pales in comparison. Remember: social media (and photos in general) highlight the high points of life. They document the good because, let’s be real, life is hard and we all crave more of the beauty and ease. But at the end of the day, you are given your life, and everyone else is given theirs. Coveting or comparing another life steals your joy. Take this as your reminder to love YOUR life!

Final Words

Well, I didn’t intend on this post to be as long as it is, but here we are. Sometimes when I write, things come out I wasn’t exactly planning on, but I trust they needed to come out. Summer can be all the things: stressful yet fun, exhilarating yet exhausting, and memorable yet bland. Embrace it all, my friends. The beauty of the season is one thing. The beauty of our lives is another.

I say this knowing and personally experiencing hard times, deep sadness, and at times, hopelessness, even in summer. But I am a true optimist at heart. I believe the good times outweigh the bad, and that something wonderful can come from every woe. I wish I knew you, and we could swap summer stories come September. Since we probably can’t, know I’ll be cheering you on from the summer sidelines, and wishing with everything in me that you wholeheartedly end up loving your summer!