You do you…with food!

Going out to eat. Americans do it on average, 5.9 times a week (including grabbing food on a lunch break and sitting down for dinner; businessinsider.com). Apparently, we’d rather pick up food or sit at restaurant table instead of eating dinner together at our own dinner tables. In terms of going out to eat, there are thousands of possibilities to choose from nowadays. Fast-food, dine-in, pick-up, semi-fast-food, fancy sit-down, etc. It’s truly amazing to think of how many choices we have, especially if you live in a larger city or area. Not everyone has those options, like my lovely, hometown of 1,000 people. My hometown got its first fast-food restaurant 15 years ago. Yep, you read that correctly. It’s a Subway, and you’d have thought they were giving away free subs to everyone fo’ life! My dad mentioned it as much as possible until the novelty wore off. What excites us so greatly like a food experience? Why do we spend so much time (and our hard-earned cash) on eating out? I believe eating in general is something majority, if not everyone, enjoys. And I’ve learned that many people do not enjoy cooking, or are so overwhelmed at the thought of putting together a meal, they don’t event try. Other emotions and feelings are tied to the food experience as well, such as pride in making a meal, or joy in tasting a delicious, filling favorite.

Speaking of food experiences, there is one food experience I truly detest like no other: the buffet restaurant. Too many people, too many options, too loud, too EVERYTHING. Normally, I fare well in an environment that is loud and contains a lot of people; I was a high school and college cheerleader, for crying out loud! That’s what cheerleaders do, we’re loud for a crowd. However, there’s just something about the buffet that’s rubbed me the wrong way for the last 20 years, and I just can’t pinpoint it. Do you want to know what’s crazy? It was my favorite experience as a kid! Because we didn’t have a lot of money (and my brother and I were wild, so I don’t think my mom had it in her to make us sit very long in a traditional restaurant), we were frequent diners of the Ponderosa, located in the “big town” next door. Although I’m not certain, I’m quite confident that kids ate free on Wednesday nights, which was the only reason we went out for dinner. I may not like a buffet now, but man, did I love it then. If I could rewind time and be a fly on the wall, I imagine seeing my eight-year-old self striding to the buffet line with swagger like a kid who just got their braces off and new shoes in the same day. Getting to carry the plate and create your own meal as well?? Get outta here! It doesn’t get much cooler for a child. Or so it didn’t back then. I vividly remember my staple Ponderosa buffet plate: a pile of mashed potatoes topped with macaroni and cheese and a sprinkle of corn. I know, I know. The side dishes of every T.V. dinner all in one pile on a plate. The taste is lost on me, but the feeling is not. I’ll never forget the glorious feeling of independence as a result of making my own dish at a restaurant!

The importance of independence is one of the biggest lessons I’ve learned, especially as a parent. Independence breeds confidence, and we all know how much confidence affects our personalities, decisions, and daily lives in general. While I do believe some people are naturally gifted with confidence, and others have room to grow (me), there are ways we can aid ourselves and our children in growing confidence through independence. Before I dive into the how-tos of helping children be more independent as eaters, let me detail my thoughts. The confidence I am writing about is not the in-your-face, dripping with arrogance, holier-than-thou type of confidence. This idea of confidence is not coming from a place of denying our need for Jesus, or making yourself your own god. In my opinion, the lines between confidence and selfishness can be blurred. So to be clear, I am here for confidence in a positive-self-esteem manner; a manner that reflects accurately on the development of our gifts and talents, and a manner that cultivates the wonder of becoming more and more able to see ourselves through the eyes of our Creator. Cooking, creating food, and feeding yourself and family can be a reflection of how we’re seen through the eyes of our Creator!

Now, let’s talk about how to encourage our little ones in growing their independence and creating their own dinner, something I am certain almost every child will love. The idea of make-you-own dinner has made its way around our home numerous times, and is now one of our tried and true weekly specials in the dinner rotation. For this dinner concept, think BUFFET. You certainly do not have to set up an actual buffet, because let’s be real, we rarely have time for that, but think “buffet” in terms of the variety and how you’re offering. To give you an idea, see the photos below from one of our beloved make-your-own-pizza nights. With my husband being a toppings and sauce guy, he’s the mastermind of the pizza nights, getting clever with what he puts on display for us. It’s the best way we get to choose what we’re eating–you do you, food-style.

As you see above, we used several small bowls for serving the toppings. It definitely gives it a polished look and keeps the items well-separated, but it’s not absolutely necessary. We’ve also used cutting boards and paper rolled out, such as butcher paper. This method allows for a super easy clean up, which is a win for everyone! With the paper, you can even get creative and label the toppings. If you’re encouraging your littles to try more foods (something you should always be doing), you can organize your toppings by color; here, you can give them instructions on how many of each color to add to their plate. We make adding at least one green item a must for every meal! Tip: do not get hung up on specific toppings, especially if you haven’t visited the grocery store lately and you’re low on certain things. Get creative! Like most buffets or salad bars, a wide array of fruits, vegetables, and sides are available, and nothing is off-limits.

Once the toppings are ready to go, allow each child to go through the line and choose their likings. Help them if they are too little, but still allow them to point at what they want. I can almost guarantee they will not only eat their food, but even enjoy it if they take part in making it! Are they adding too much cheese and not enough veggies? Making something you find less-than-desirable? It’s all good! Monitor what they’re doing in an attempt to encourage and teach them rather than correct and coerce them.

Make-your-own is the buffet’s laid-back, fun aunt! There really aren’t rules against what to do, and you can eat this meal anytime of day, like weekend brunch bowls (as mentioned in the Feasting with Family…blog entry). Leftover toppings are a practical and simple way to fill the need of another night’s dinner. Think pizza, soup, or salads. Keeping it super simple, we even do what we call lunch plates, where we simply let the kids choose what they want from items like sliced apples and cucumbers, various rice crackers or almond flour with hummuses, protein balls/bars, carrots and dips, etc. It’s not fancy, but it works. As long as everyone is fed, you’re doing well! Not every dinner needs to be on nice plates, at the dinner table, or with traditional dinner food.

Ideas for make-your-own:

• pizza
• flatbreads
• chili
• salads
• hot dog bar
• baked potato bar
• nachos
• sandwiches/subs
• quesadillas or wraps (think outside the box of a traditional quesadilla)
• egg scrambles
• quinoa, rice, or noodle bowls
• smoothie bowls
• themed bowls, like: Greek, Mexican, Thai, or BBQ
• yogurt parfaits

The possibilities and combinations are literally endless. I love the flexibility in these meals, almost more than the fun! When we tell the kids we’re doing make-your-own________ for dinner, they can hardly contain themselves, just like eight-year-old me hitting up the Ponderosa buffet. I truly believe we can all start enjoying more dinners at home with meal remedies such as these. Even though I love a good night out every once in a while, a night home with the family crowded around the bar as our buffet is much more magical and memorable than any run-of-the-mill restaurant. Keep that in mind when you’re deciding whether to eat out or in. You’ll be surprised at how awesome you are at creating a fun-filled dinner for your family, and how beneficial it can be to encourage your children’s independence. The best part? Their joy and smiles!